Hello Portland!

I have landed in Portland, Oregon, and it is good to be here. Oh so good. Why is it so good? Because I am being oh so good to myself.

I'm staying at a lovely hotel that I will tell you all about after I leave because I am that paranoid. At this lovely hotel is a lovely spa, and 30 minutes after checking in I was getting a massage.

Ryan, my miracle worker, asked me how I was feeling and I told him about my neck pains (from sleeping on it funny) and my back pains (ciatica). He said, "How much to you want to fix the ciatica?" and I said, "I'm not afraid of a little pain." Luckily for me Ryan had the magic touch and I barely grimaced. He lightly touched my lower back and knew exactly what I was doing wrong. "You sit funny in your chair at work, don't you?" "Why yes", I said, "I sit on my right foot. This is like going to the back psychic." Ten minutes later, after a few astonished gasps from Ryan about how screwed up my back felt, he set me straight and then proceeded to pamper me with a massage that left me drooling. I was completely out of it by the time he was done with me...he had to lead me to the door because I would have just sat on his table smiling for another hour.

My back feels better than it has in YEARS.

Afterwards I toddled next door for a gourmet meal of gnocchi sprinkled with Oregon black truffles. I had to get it because WHEN IN ROME, RIGHT? The truffles were diced very finely and sprinkled all over the gnocchi and I tried just a forkful of them so I could see what they tasted like by themselves. People, truffles taste like dirt. Seriously, just like dirt, with a slightly better aftertaste. But mixed with the gnocchi and the cheese and the greens? It was a totally different story...such an amazing dish. I paired it with a local red wine and finished the meal off with a local brew that has Africa in the name. I'm low on details tonight, as I've had two drinks, a massage, and only about 5.5 hours of sleep last night.

I've chosen my itinerary for tomorrow. Plan A is to visit The Grotto, which is "A serene oasis in the midst of the city...a natural gallery that offers a place of peace and quiet reflection for all people."

(Whoa...my back just cracked audibly. Ryan, you are a shaman.)

In The Grotto I will find the Portland Japanese Garden, the International Rose Test Gareden, the Hoyt Arboretum, World Forestry Center, and the Oregon Zoo. I'm thirty-three and I still love the zoo.

Plan B goes into effect if it rains. I will take a tour of every brewery in Portland accessible via public transportation. If that proves to be too ambitious, I will visit every brewery on the local transit line that I can still stand upright at.

Either way there will be stories to share.